Wednesday, August 30, 2023

My Ukrainian Daughter & Grandson

I’ve always said, “if God wants you to have children, they’ll show up”.  It doesn’t really matter what stage of life you’re in and they don’t always come the natural way.  They just show up in your life and you don’t know how or why.  You just accept that it's God’s will and open your heart, because after all, you can’t argue with God.  He wins every time.

Late last November, I opened the Sunday newspaper to find a front page feature article about Jenya Shulym and her eight year old son, Egor.  They had fled their home in Russian occupied territory near Ukraine's Zaporizhzhia Nuclear Power Plant, where Jenya and her husband Maksim worked and lived with Egor.  There was a picture of Jenya and Egor arriving at Dulles and their U.S. Sponsors, Anna and Travis.  Their escape from Ukraine would rival any movie plot for sheer danger and peril.  I looked at the picture thinking “that could be any one of my daughters”.    

Being Christmastime, it seemed the entire city was indulging in holiday spirit.  Stores, restaurants, bars and even tiny coffeehouses were filled with people spending money after two years of COVID lockdown.  It was unlikely that Jenya and Egor would have much if any Christmas.  That didn’t seem right.  I reached out to the article’s author, Heather Rousseau, and asked if 3rd Street Coffeehouse could maybe buy a few presents.  Heather asked Jenya, who suggested a couple of very inexpensive stuffed animals for Egor.  She didn’t want anything for herself other than this - she just wanted friends.  That was all - she just wanted friends. 

Meeting Jenya and Egor
Photo By Heather Rousseau

Christmas Dance Contest
Photo By Heather Rousseau

Jenya’s simple request for friends resulted in a series of events.  It was either God calling the shots, or maybe as Jenya thinks, her deceased father watching over her.  We planned a little Christmas party at the Coffeehouse for her and Egor and the whole community jumped on board.  At least 20 people and a dozen or so businesses stepped up with food, music, games, presents and a ton of love.  Jenya and Egor walked in the Coffeehouse that  day with Anna and Heather, Santa and Mrs. Clause, and about forty or fifty others.   It was the first time we met and we celebrated Christmas like no other Christmas I can remember.  It was total joy and fun from start to finish.  Afterwards, I told Jenya and Anna that they were my Ukrainian daughters.   Jenya had tears of joy in her eyes and later wrote on her Facebook page that it was a Christmas miracle.  I had to agree.

Egor and I With A Nice Bass From Smith Mountain Lake
Photo by Denise Schmucker

Egor and I connected immediately.  He didn’t know much English, but with a couple smiles and high fives, we both knew that we were destined to be buddies.  He loves dancing as much as I do, and both of us love singing and making up silly songs.  Most of all, we both love sports of all kinds and pizza at Gracie’s in Grandin Village.  Around mid-March, Jenya and Egor joined my family for a minor league hockey game, their very first.  Neither of them knew anything about hockey, but they were hooked immediately.  Loud and crazy crowds, and home team wins, made them instant fans - all the way to the championship. Jenya posted the video below the next day (because she has crazy good video skills).  As the weather warmed, we switched the Salem Red Sox baseball games, Blue Cow ice cream trips and fishing.  I was in full-on Grampa mode and having a ball with Egor.


Jenya didn’t drive and made it clear at the start, that wasn’t going to change.  She said it in a way that meant it wasn’t up for debate.  It needed no translation.  I picked them up for hockey games and, over time, our car conversations went from happy talk and culture questions to more serious topics, like family back home, hopes, dreams and aspirations.  She talked a lot about her husband Maksim, her mom, grandmother and sister.  I told her about Denise, Chris and our three daughters and grandkids. One night I asked about her Dad.  She softly told me that he had died suddenly when she was only sixteen, and her grandfather passed shortly afterwards.  Their passing left her with feelings of tremendous sadness and loss.  It was heartbreaking to hear.

Over time, a closer bond of trust developed.  One day, Jenya asked if I would teach her to drive.  I knew it was a very sensitive topic for her and it took a lot of courage for her to even ask me.  I said sure, I’ve taught all of my kids to drive and half of their friends.  She warned me that she’d never ever sat behind the wheel and was terrified that she’d crash my car.  I assured her that all of my kids survived my teaching them how to drive, and so did their friends.  I also realized how important that bond of trust was to her.  

Driving lessons started and gradually progressed from awkward starts, stops and turns to increases in skills and confidence.  Egor was often along with us, and a constant source of encouragement for her.  They have been through a lot together and he knows just how to give her the confidence to get through something scary.  He is mature beyond his years in many ways, but also knows how to be a sports loving, ice cream loving kid.  Before long, I was taking pictures and videos of Jenya driving, for her to share with her family back home.  In Ukraine, there was a lot of excitement and encouragement.  In Roanoke, fear turned to confidence, then fun, and big smiles on Jenya’s face.  Somewhere in the laps around those parking lots, I know her father was smiling down on her.  We both felt it.  It was as real as a spring breeze.

As spring turned into summer, Jenya was really missing her home and family in Ukraine.  She had hopes of Ukrainian victory by mid-summer, and a return to her family.  We spoke honestly of the realities of war and often, there were silent tears over the immense difficulties and challenges that were faced. I told her I’d support any decision she made, but inside, my fears for their safety were on high alert. She bought tickets for a mid August flight and shortly after that, the Kakhovka Dam near her home was blown up.  In the horrors of that event, her longing to return to home and family grew even stronger.  It was clear that both she and Egor were returning home.  Egor backed up her decision 100%.

Family Picture at a Salem Red Sox Game
Photo by Chris Schmucker

As the days and weeks ticked down, this newly realized family bond matured and grew even stronger.  We talked, we laughed, and tried hard to squeeze the most fun we could out of the time left.  Denise, Chris and Kaleigh joined the fun several times and we all shared hopes and dreams for the future.  Jenya gave Denise and I beautiful hand stitched vishivanky shirts made in Ukraine. On departure day, Denise and I showed up at Anna and Travis’s apartment for coffee and a couple parting gifts.  Amid many tears and hugs, the bags were loaded in my trunk and we started one last drive up to Dulles International Airport.  Along the way, we quietly talked about memories, hopes and dreams; of families and bonds, and promises for the future.

We had a final meal together and said heartfelt goodbyes in a quiet and tasty restaurant near the airport. Jenya had tears in her eyes and Egor comforted her, saying Mom, don’t cry.  I softly told him it’s OK to cry, when it comes from the heart.  From there, I drove a short distance to the airport to drop them off with one final hug.  I was sending them back to Maksim and the rest of her family, back to their home.  

One Last Time at 3rd Street
Wearing My Vishivanky Shirt That Jenya Gave Me
Photo by Lena Kuhfawl

I’ve always said, “if God wants you to have children, they’ll show up”.  It doesn’t really matter what stage of life you’re in and they don’t always come the natural way.  They just show up in your life and you don’t know how or why.  You just accept that it's God’s will and open your heart, because after all, you can’t argue with God.  Maybe it was God that brought our lives together, maybe it was Jenya's father.  Whoever, and however, we're all grateful it happened.

If you’ve hung with me this far, thanks.  Please consider liking or sharing this post and subscribing to receive new posts, typically one per month.  If you have a similar experience, or other thoughts, please leave a comment for Jenya, Egor or myself.  I’ll be sure to let you know I’ve seen it.  One last thing - please pray for Ukraine.  There’s a lot of good people just like Jenya and Egor and they deserve our prayers and support.  


Wednesday, August 2, 2023

Wanted: Time Machine (low mileage)

TARDIS ("Time And Relative Dimension In Space") Time Machine from "Dr. Who"

Wanted:  Time machine (low mileage). 
Must be calibrated and accurate to within +/- 24 hours.  Prefer American made, but will consider foreign models.  "Return To Present" functionality is desirable, but I can live without it.  If you have one, or know of one for sale, let me know in the comments along with price and shipping info.

That is what I posted on Facebook this morning.  Of course it was half in jest, and was received as such by my friends.  But it also reflects my increasing awareness of the value of time, especially over the last few months.  I want more of it.  And, I’d like a chance to go back and savor a few things, some of which I was present for, others that I wish I had been present for.  A “Time Machine” would be perfect for that.


Imagine if you could go back in time and experience past memories again in the present tense.  Maybe to enjoy some good time, or a precious moment, that you remember.  Maybe to change the outcome of an experience that didn’t go as well as you’d hoped.  Maybe to hug someone one last time and tell them how much that they meant to you before they unexpectedly passed.  I lost a co-worker to cancer in the last month.  I didn’t even know that she was sick.  I don’t think she did either.  I never told her what a great person she was and how much I enjoyed having her around.  I wish I had a time machine to go back and tell her.


For the past few months, I’ve been teaching my Ukrainian daughter Jenya to drive, just like I’ve done in the past with the rest of my kids and half of their friends.  It brings back a ton of good memories from the past - kids nervous, excited, laughing, and sharing deep thoughts.  Those are memories that mean so much.  Teaching Jenya to drive has connected me again to all those good times, along with creating new memories for both of us.  My car has served as our time machine this summer.  Jenya’s son Egor and I have bonded over sports this year.  A baseball and two fifty year old gloves have been our time machine and when we’re playing catch, I’m a kid again.  


Of course there might be other things to accomplish with a time machine.  Maybe I could go back and experience events that I wasn't there for in the first place.  I traveled a lot for work earlier in my career, missing events with my kids and with my wife Denise.  It would be nice to go back in time and get a second chance on some of those.  I haven’t seen nearly enough of our grandkids who live in Charlotte.  Too much work and not enough fun.  A time machine would be handy to get back after I retire.


Maybe I could go back in time and experience things like my sister being born or alter the course of history.  Who wouldn’t change or stop the great evils and catastrophic events like wars, pandemics, etc.?  Would a time machine help?  Could crisis and death be averted or are such events fixed and immovable?  I’d sure like to try… if I only had a time machine.  


What would you do if you had a time machine?  Tell me in the comments about it and give me your ideas for time machine specifications.  Maybe together we’ll come up with the perfect time machine specifications that someone will someday build for us.  I’ve got my list.  What’s on your list?  


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Anyone recognize this famous time machine?

Friday, June 30, 2023

Baseball

Baseball.   For generations, it has been a foundation of relationships between men and boys here in America.  Through baseball, men pass on the values of teamwork, sportsmanship and love of a little white sphere flying off a bat or popping into a glove.  It’s a shared experience that builds bonds of friendship and love across generations, one that transcends language and cultures.  I bet that Abner Doubleday never dreamed that the game that he was credited with inventing would grow to be so much more than a sport.  I love baseball and have since I was a little kid playing rec ball in school yards and later little league.


When my son Chris was young, we used to play catch and I’d go to all his games and practices, starting late in the winter and on through the spring and summer.  I still remember Coach Carr teaching Chris and his teammates basic skills of hitting and fielding while snowflakes were still flying.  I’d take Chris to Salem Avalanche games and later Salem Red Sox games - more than a hundred of them over the years.  But it's been awhile since I experienced the joy of playing catch or watching a game with a young boy.  


All that changed earlier this year when I discovered that my young Ukrainian friend Egor Shulym was just as much of a sports nut as I am.  Egor is 8 and is a gifted, natural athlete.   This was clear the first time I took a little white ball and two baseball gloves out of my trunk.  One glove was my Rawlings Jim LeFebvre basket-weave model that I’ve owned since I was about 10.  I bought it with money I earned cutting grass, raking leaves and shoveling snow.  It’s been sitting in a closet for far too long and needed a bit of leather conditioner, but was in pretty good shape.  I let Egor slip it on his left hand and in a few minutes we were zipping the ball back and forth like we’d done it for years.  For just a moment, I was 10 again too.  It was magic.

No longer in a closet - my old Rawlings Glove

My buddy Egor - he's a natural ball player

A few weeks ago, I was invited to a picnic atop Mill Mountain to meet some new Ukrainian families who have recently arrived in Roanoke as refugees.   They are young couples with young kids about Egor’s age, learning to live and navigate American society and culture while also struggling to learn a new language and missing the home and life in Ukraine.  Egor and his mom Jenya were there and Egor had brought the two baseball gloves and a ball with him, intent on snagging a game of catch with me.  So as we started zipping the ball back and forth, the other kids came over and before long, we had them playing too.  Then their Dad’s came over and put on baseball gloves for the first time in their lives.  Within minutes, kids and dads who have never seen or played baseball were laughing and playing, and not a word was needed to translate the sheer joy of playing a game of catch.  Abner Doubleday would sure be proud, as was I, just to be a part of it.  I love baseball.  I love sharing it with my new Ukrainian friends.  What a game.

My new Ukrainian friends

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Wednesday, May 31, 2023

It's Not Really A Coffeehouse

Julie and Josh Kinn as Kinnfolk played last Friday night

3rd Street Coffeehouse.   It’s not really a “coffeehouse”, at least not in the sense that people come for over-priced latte's and plug on a laptop or chat with friends while music plays in the background.  At 3rd Street Coffeehouse, the songs and songwriters are what matter the most. We're a throwback to the coffeehouses of Greenwich Village, back in the early 60’s, where folks like Bob Dylan, Tom Paxton and Joni Mitchell started their musical careers.  A lot of others too.  Like days of old, incredibly talented songwriters and performers grace our stage every Friday night, laying their souls bare for all to see and hear.  Some of my best friends are these traveling troubadours, folks like Julie and Josh Kinn, Shawn Byrne, Scott Cook and Pamela Mae, Roy & Kim Schneider and dozens more.  They live their lives creating unbelievably great original music and doing everything they can to share it at places like 3rd Street Coffeehouse.  It’s not an easy life. It's generally not financially lucrative, but it's a calling - one that won't be denied or surpressed.

The people who sit at the tables are often other songwriters.  They know what it takes to create an interesting verse, wrap it in a melody and travel from city to city, hoping to make a few dollars and continue on in a quixotic pursuit of sharing their creativity.  Sometimes, there are folks who don’t fit in at the bars or other social venues.  They are drawn to 3rd Street to share with others who, like themselves, enjoy and appreciate the magic feeling that occurs when a songwriter carries them away to a place where songs free the mind and spirit.  It is magic indeed, and it happens more than you would think possible.  It’s like the spirit of John Prine and all the songwriters of past, present and future inhabit the walls and stage. It's very real and will make your skin tingle.


Quite often, 3rd Street Coffeehouse is a place of small miracles, where extraordinary things happen on a regular basis.  A senior couple, who meet there by chance, and wind up sharing their lives together.  People overcoming everything from major medical issues to broken hearts on a regular basis.  A hastily contrived COVID plan to raise a few bucks for Feeding Southwest Virginia on Tuesday nights by LiveStreaming local songwriters that raises over $32,000 and provides over 160,000 meals.  A young woman escapes Russian occupied Ukraine with her son and finds a community of love, acceptance and support in the darkest time of her life.  Quiet, yet undeniable miracles built on the love of musicians and music lovers.  You can almost feel the spirit of love from generations gone for over a hundred years that the room has existed.  Miracles happen frequently within these walls.


Since 1987, 3rd Street Coffeehouse has provided a place for songwriters and road-weary musicians to find a loving and accepting audience that values what they bring. We’ve survived through thick and thin, with the help of Trinity United United Methodist Church, our great volunteers and even greater fans.  In 2017, I accepted the sacred honor and privilege of guiding our extraordinary volunteer team and keeping the music, and the miracles, alive.  It is an honor to be a part of such a community of faith, love and respect, but there is no doubt a greater power at work than I could ever command or summon.  I accept that as fact and don’t question it.  Somehow, by the grace of God and the support of live / original music fans, we’ve kept it going for 37 years.

If you’ve ever been to 3rd Street Coffeehouse, you get it.  You’ve seen and felt the magic. You've seen miracles and heard great music. If you’ve never been, I invite you to drop by.  If you’re inclined to support the cause, please know that we very much appreciate it. Our PayPal address is gramps1842@gmail.com. 


What's your favorite memory at 3rd Street Coffeehouse? Please let me know in the comments section and be sure to like and share the post with your friends.


Jenya and Egor Shulym (foreground) are proud Ukrainians

Folk icon Tom Paxton and other songwriters helped raise
over $32,000 for Feeding Southwest Virginia over 18 months

We're located at 305 Mountain Avenue SW, Roanoke, VA 24016



Tuesday, May 2, 2023

Tribute To A Master - The Passing Of Gordon Lightfoot

 



I was going to write about a hockey game tonight.  The game I saw last night in Roanoke was maybe the greatest game I’ve ever seen live.  But on the way home, I heard the news that Gordon Lightfoot had passed away.  I wasn’t shocked or surprised, but I sure was bummed out to hear that news. He deserves some thoughts and maybe a few comments on how he affected my life, and probably yours as well.


Gordon Lightfoot was the Mount Rushmore of modern songwriting.  Put another way, he was the guy that John Prine and Bob Dylan looked up to.  I once saw a video of John playing a club in Canada with Gordon sitting in the front row.  You couldn’t miss how John was just over the moon because his hero was there to hear him.   Dylan said that his fellow singer died “without ever having made a bad song”, and every time he listened to one of them, he “wished it would last forever”.  I couldn't agree more.


Every song I've ever heard Gordon play was an absolute jewel in every respect.  His lyrics painted images that one could see, feel, hear and touch.  Who hasn’t felt a chill up their spine when listening to “The Wreck of The Edmund Fitzgerald” or felt the pain of a lost love listening to “If you Could Read My Mind”?  His composition, arranging and production were second to none.  Listen to the way the orchestral strings come in on “If You Could Read My Mind” or how the crash of the drums create the crash of the storm on “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald”.  He released a dozen or more other major hits across Canada, America and the rest of the world over the years, every one a masterpiece.  My personal favorites are “Canadian Railroad Trilogy” and “Song For A Winter’s Night”.  


I had tickets to see Gordon at the Berglund Center in Roanoke in 2020, which was postponed due to COVID until August of 2021.  I was all set to go to the rescheduled show in August of 2021, but Gordon broke his wrist and the show was again postponed to February of last year.  On the night that he was to play, I had a gig so I missed out and gave the tickets to a friend.  Gordon had scheduled another U.S. tour for later this year, but canceled it just a few short weeks ago.  Gordon died peacefully on Monday, May 1, 2023 at 730 p.m. at Sunnybrook Hospital in Toronto. He died of natural causes. He was 84 years old.  He may have passed, but his music will last forever. He'll remain as the Mount Rushmore of songwriting long after I'm gone.


Thanks to those who followed my blog in April.  I hope to make it worth your while.  If you enjoy my little musings, I hope that you too will hit the follow button.  This month, for every new “Follow”, I’ll be donating $10 to an organization I love to support, Feeding Southwest Virginia.  Hit that button and help us feed our less fortunate neighbors and friends.

Friday, March 31, 2023

Now It's Your Turn

Blogger Buddies
Top Row: Mallory Gayle Graham, Mike Franke and Forrest Baldwin
Bottom Row: Dan Smith, Randy Lewis Brown and You!!

I started a little blog improvement project in March.  Reaching out to my favorite bloggers and a social media guru, I asked how I can A) improve my blog and B) increase the number of folks who see it, read it or follow it.  There is always room for improvement and my goal is to do just that.  It’s an interesting project, interesting enough to share their insights before I ask you to share yours.

In no particular order, I’d like to introduce a few of the folks I talked to.  Hyperlinks to their blogs or websites are included.  If you like my writing, you’d probably like them too.


Mike Franke is a singer-songwriter, blog writer, teacher, engineering project manager, 3rd Street Coffeehouse Booking Agent and dreamer of big dreams.  I bounce ideas, viewpoints, new songs and bad jokes off of Mike all the time and consider him a brother.  He has 8 blogs published on topics from music to getting people with divergent viewpoints to listen to and understand each other.  His website (Understanding On Purpose) exists with that goal in mind, and includes a Blog as part of that. 


Mallory Gayle Graham is a singer-songwriter and half of the Folk-Americana duo “The Rough & Tumble”.  Her writing is uniquely personal.  I consider her a special voice in the blogosphere, especially for people who have not grown up in optimal circumstances or have lost their confidence. Her voice needs to be heard, shared and amplified. She provided me with great feedback about how her blog started as something of a self-therapy and a way to sort out her excess feelings and thoughts that weren't funneling directly into songwriting. Her blog is Quartz Before Pallets.


Randy Lewis Brown is a Texas based singer-songwriter and columnist on the Americana Highways website (a big deal in the Folk and Americana music community).  His songs and blog both reflect the sensibilities of the seasoned pro that he is.  Despite his musical and literary excellence, he is a modest and unpretentious soul. He posts mostly about being a performing songwriter and songwriting in general with more than a bit of wisdom and experience.   He gave me excellent advice on distribution and the element of luck.  His blog is Behind the Pine Curtain.


Dan Smith is an award-winning journalist and photographer (since 1964), father, grandfather, teacher, organizer. He is a former Virginia Business Journalist of the Year and a member of the Virginia Communications Hall of Fame. He has written eight books, two of them novels. He knows his stuff and didn’t cut me any slack.  He told me my posts are too long, need larger font and a lot of other very useful advice.  I’m working hard to implement them, but writing shorter posts is a high bar for me as I love words. I hope Dan continues to help me grow as a writer. His blog is “editrdan”.


Forrest Baldwin of Tribal Sounds Productions is a digital media promotion wizard and a monster singer-songwriter / musician.  Being a Millennial and a Mensa level technology geek, he knows a lot about things like Search Engine Optimization (SEO) with keywords and artificial intelligence (AI).  This AI stuff is a bit scary.  It wouldn’t take long for AI to learn to write as badly as I do (maybe 5 minutes) and you’d never know the difference.  If you have a website or blog you want to energize and break the internet for your business, Forrest is a superb resource. He also says he has a blog in the works, so keep an eye out for that too.


OK, NOW IT’S YOUR TURN!  If you’ve read this far, you qualify to give me your input on how this blog can be improved.  Look at a few of my other posts as this one is really long and not representative of what I normally write.  But seriously, anything is fair game for comments - design and layout, content, ease of reading.  I’m seriously interested in serving my readers and upping my game.  Would you help me by giving me your feedback?  Put them in the comments below or email me at gramps1842@gmail.com.  I will be eternally grateful even if you tell me it sucks (just tell me why).


If you enjoy these little ruminations about life, please consider hitting the “Follow” button.  For every new “Follow” in April, I’ll donate $10 to the American Cancer Society.  



Tuesday, February 28, 2023

Ukrainian Now

It was just over a year ago.  Russia had launched an invasion of Ukraine and, in those first days, it looked like it was going to be a blowout victory for Russia.  At least that’s what I heard and read.  It was like Muhammed Ali, in his prime, going up against a club fighter.  Ukraine didn’t stand a chance.  I had no real idea of why Russia was invading or really anything about Ukraine, other than our past president had tried to strong arm their current president and ended up getting impeached for it.  Ukraine wasn’t on my radar at all and the whole thing would probably be over in a week or so anyway, and nobody would pay much attention.  End of story.  Except it wasn’t.


It turned out the Ukrainians didn’t get the memo.  They didn’t roll over and their president didn’t catch the first flight out (which was offered by the United States).  “I don’t need a lift, I need ammunition” he boldly said, and it was transmitted around the world in a flash.  It was a gutsy move, but it placed him firmly in the center of the western media circus and caught everyone's attention.  He was the biggest longshot since David went up against Goliath.  I figured he’d have his 15 minutes of fame and end up in the crosshairs of a firing squad or get blown to smithereens by a missile.  I was wrong.  Everyone was wrong.  And every night, this guy would come out and lift his nation's spirits and tell them they not only could win, but would win.  You can’t help but admire that kind of spunk.


For 6 months this went on and like most Americans, I was rooting for him and rooting for them.  They were the underdog and I'm no fan of Putin. I wanted to help, but what does an average guy do other than send a few bucks to an international relief organization I’d never even heard of.  Heck, I don’t think I’d ever met a single person from Ukraine that I knew of.  That was about to change.  


In late November, the Sunday Roanoke Times carried a front page article about a young Ukrainian woman who came to Roanoke with her son as refugees.  It was the kind of story that you can’t not read.  It was heartbreaking and unimaginable to me, but also a story of courage and strength.  It was written by my friend Heather Quesinberry (Rousseau).  I sent her a text to tell her how it moved me and how much I admired her writing.  That led to an exchange of texts, which led to more texts, which ended up with a Christmas party being planned for mid December for this young mother (Jenya), her son Egor and the family they lived with - Anna (also from Ukraine), Travis and son Emmett.  I sure didn’t see that coming.  


Having traveled a bit internationally, I was pretty certain there would be culture gaps to cross. How do Ukrainians celebrate Christmas?  What other cultural landmines might exist (that you only learn about when you travel somewhere)?  My buddies Greg, Cellie and Mollye wanted to perform a song Tom Paxton and John McCutcheon wrote called “Ukrainian Now”, which is a very emotional song.  Too emotional perhaps?  We struggled with that, but in the end, our new Ukrainian friends very much appreciated it and I think it helped form a bond between us.  Then there was trying to figure out what else would be fun and appropriate?  Jenya had the right answer - dancing!  Every aspect of planning (or lack of planning) worked out phenomenally, as it seldom does in real life.  


Since that day in mid December, we’ve had several other occasions to gather with the local Ukrainian community and develop bonds of friendship.  Most recently the Ukrainian community came together to commemorate one year of defending their land with a rally in downtown Roanoke.  I can’t even begin to describe the emotions I witnessed.  It’s better to let you hear what our Ukrainian friend Anna Miroshnychenko said as she addressed the rally that day [big thanks to Heather Quesinberry for capturing that piece of video].  


What have I learned along the way that I didn’t know before?  The first thing I learned was that much of what I thought I knew was wrong.  As Brad Paisley’s new song "Same Here" makes so clear, Ukrainians are just like us.  They love each other.  They laugh hearty.  They cry hard. They love to dance (especially Jenya) and have big meals and include everyone. Ukrainians celebrate life and love and feel pain in exactly the same ways we do.  They have tremendous pride in their country and stand tall with dignity, honor, grace and the same love of freedom and democracy that we do. Those who came here as refugees like Jenya, are very grateful to us for providing safety and support. They are eager to work, but also dream of returning home to Ukraine someday to rejoin their families and rebuild their nation.  They are well educated and had great jobs and first class cities back home.  They aren’t from some backward third world country where women ride in ox carts and wear babushkas.  They are just like us.


Ukraine is a small country, smaller than Texas.  They are outgunned and outmanned by the Russian invaders.  They are literally fighting for national survival against the most brutal dictator since Adolf Hitler.  What is happening in Ukraine is nothing less than genocide - the destruction of their land and culture and the annihilation of their people on a scale that could rival the Holocaust if not stopped.  There are those in America who say that we shouldn’t support them with money and resources, that we should keep our money at home and let that nation fall.  God help us.  Ukrainian defenders are all that stands between us and World War III.  And.... they are just like us.  An attack on them is an attack on us.  As Tom Paxton and John McCutcheon put it so eloquently, I am Ukrainian now.  Like my father before me, I will fight the evil that confronts us and support my new friends.  We all should.


Photo By Jenya Shulim Photography - eugeniashulim@gmail.com 

If you enjoyed this post, I hope that you'll share it and maybe even follow my blog, which is published monthly. If I get something like 10,000 followers, maybe I'll win something. Maybe I won't. If I do win anything, I'll be sure to let you know and we'll share it together. In any case, thanks for reading along and be sure to share any thoughts and comments below.


My Ukrainian Daughter - Still Waiting For The Happy Ending

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